Facebook Post by Rabbi Perlin in the Time of Coronavirus (4/8/2020)

Wednesday Post 4/8/20: Why is this night THE SAME as all other nights?

One of the most important lessons I learned in graduate school was that the questions we ask determine the answers we get. The rabbis knew this when they formulated the cornerstone of our seder experience affectionately called, “The Four Questions,” which is really one question and four answers (which have changed over time by the way). We are told that the Passover seder night is different because 1) we eat matzah, 2) we eat bitter herbs, 3) we dip twice, and 4) we recline. And you know what? WE ARE GOING TO DO ALL OF THOSE THINGS TONIGHT!

Living through this pandemic plague together, Jews all over the globe will continue to celebrate the most celebrated Jewish holiday. Faced with the challenge, we have been preparing for days for the Zoom seders, which will unite families and friends from near and far. We are doing what our people have always done in difficult times – we are adapting. We are a resilient and creative people. We are making seder work this year under the most extreme circumstances.

Families face challenges to Pesach every year. It is so hard to have the first seder after a beloved family member dies, and our hearts go out to every broken heart tonight. It is hard to have seder when kids don’t come home, or it’s not your turn to have them once they are married. It is hard to make Passover when you move to a new place without the traditional family and friends who have gathered around your table for years, or to have seder when the people who usually invite you move or stop making seder for whatever the reason. It is hard to have seder if no one invites you.

But, this year is different, for sure. So, that is the simple answer to the question, “Why is this night different than all other nights?” Because, on all other seder nights we were not living through a pandemic. (It has been a hundred years since the last one!)

So, let’s focus on what is the same. Let’s find comfort in the familiar symbols and traditions. Let’s find comfort in the noisy relatives, the grateful friends, the off-key singers, and the joy in the faces of children looking for the afikomen. Our chicken soup is made and Gary has the matzah ball batter in the fridge. He is chopping, as he usually does on pre-seder morning. And when I am done with all my rabbi work today, I will make stuffing and roast the chicken. And later today, albeit in a new way, we will sit at my desk… with my beautiful grandchildren and the army of people Jonah has invited to the Zoom seder he is leading. I will probably cry with joy at our resilience.

“Why is this night the same as all other nights?” We are still Jews. Passover is still here. We are still retelling the story of our Exodus and freedom from slavery. And we are still waiting for this to be over so we can open our doors and say, “All who are hungry come and eat.” Although, I think in the future we will ask people to bring toilet paper as a hostess gift.

May what is the same sustain you this Passover, and remind you to find comfort in the familiar in these trying times. Chag Sameach. Have a zissen/sweet Pesach!