A Time for Change, Patience, and Awareness (September 2014 KOL)
As we gear up for High Holy Days each year, every Jew is asked to self-evaluate and to consider what personal and spiritual changes are in order for the New Year. Change does not come easy to most people. It seems that we are most comfortable with the familiar. Yet, change and adaptation are key to human survival biologically, historically, and even religiously. Had we Jews not found a way to keep Judaism alive after the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem (twice, I might add!), or had we failed to embrace women in leadership roles, TBS would not be in our lives today.
In some ways, the biggest change we face as a community is that we will only have one rabbi for the coming year, after fifteen years of having two. I am doing everything in my power to make the transition as smooth as possible for all of you, especially the children. I will need your help and understanding as the year unfolds. There is only one of me and with my added responsibilities in the school, mentoring a new student cantor, and handling the demands of our aging community, some of the things you have come to count on will need to change for this year.
1) I will not be doing any non-emergency counseling in September and early October, until all the holidays (from Rosh Hashanah to Simchat Torah) are over. Please do not call or ask for appointments this coming month, as I just can’t accommodate them in my ever demanding schedule.
2) Emails have become a great burden in my day. Please know that it may take a while for me to respond. I cannot take care of those in need, get ready for High Holy Days, run the temple and religious school, handle 25 B’nai Mitzvah, teach all of my classes and answer 200 emails each day. Please be very thoughtful about when you send an email and what you request in it. Certainly, I want to be here for you, but it may be best to call the temple office with immediate needs and important concerns.
3) It will be more difficult for me to makehouse calls and non-emergency hospital visits this year. My typical day is 9 a.m. to 10 p.m., every day except Mondays (my only day off). Historically, I have left openings for these kinds of things or have shared the load with an assistant rabbi. I will do my best to take care of everyone, but beg your understanding on days when I cannot drop my schedule and everything I have to do, as I historically have. There will be no place to reschedule my appointments and responsibilities during a year where I will be working even more hours and will have many more new demands on my time. In cases of member deaths, I will always drop everything and rearrange my schedule to accommodate dying, death, funerals and mourning demands that turn all of our schedules upside down. I appreciate your understanding in these matters.
4) When I am away, there will be times when the rabbi on call will not be me, but that rabbi will only be on call for real emergencies, dying and death. Some of the psychological emergencies will need to appropriately go to Jewish Social Services, therapists, and emergency rooms.
5) Religious school families should first go to Donna Courtney and Sharon Kaufman with your issues before you come to me. I will be here to assist with matters they are unable to handle, but these two women are so capable and have been put in place to handle most of your religious school concerns with care and the time needed to make sure every person is treated with the time and thought you deserve. Rest assured that I will be consulted on all matters where I am needed.
6) There will only be one rabbi at oneg, so you need to share me. Please make an effort to give as many people access to saying Shabbat Shalom. Our conversations may need to be shorter, but it is important for me to be able to meet and greet as many people as I can each Friday night.
For most members, the changes will be unnoticeable. School, services, High Holy Days and temple life will go smoothly and as expected. For those who tend to use me more regularly, you may feel there is less access to my time, and I appreciate your understanding that this has to be for the coming year.
Change is never easy. Not for me, or for you. My rabbinate has always been a very personalized one, trying to be here for every member, in every way possible. It will be hard for me to acknowledge my own limitations of time and energy as the year unfolds. I already appreciate those of you who have expressed your concerns about my being spread too thin. Thank you, in advance, for utilizing my amazing staff and our phenomenal leadership and volunteers whenever you can.
Temple B’nai Shalom is an amazing caring community. We will continue to care and share as a temple family should. I will do my best to facilitate the changes this year, guided by the Jewish values that are the hallmark of my rabbinate and our sacred community.
From my house to yours, I wish you a wonderful 5775!
Faithfully yours,
Rabbi Amy R. Perlin, D.D.